I Guess We Will Have to Ban Knifes Now

Even though the machete/butcher’s cleaver terrorists in England openly stated they were Jihadists, the media still can’t seem to accept that simple fact.  Something else, probably America or right wing nutjobs, must be the root cause.  Something like a combination of these:

• The attackers weren’t really Jihadists.  They were just following orders because AIPAC had their families.
• They were just so mad that 24 will be coming back.
• Bath salts followed by too many hours watching Gordon Ramsey.
• This Youtube video.
• They were really vacationing Tea Partiers, and this was their way of mourning Margaret Thatcher.
• They were driven to violence by British cuisine.
• Lack of bacon makes anyone testy.
• They were just soccer hooligans who hadn’t realized the Manchester United brawl hadn’t already ended.
• They were paid operatives of the NRA employed to demonstrate how vulnerable an unarmed society is.
• If they guy didn’t want to get attacked, then he shouldn’t have dressed like a soldier.
• They thought they heard the victim mention Trig in a disparaging manner, and they just love math so much they couldn’t bear it. (For you Bunkerhillbilly)